No, I'm not talking about the movie. I'm talking about the town I live in. Seriously, according to stgeorge.com, here are the laws that clubs must abide in the city.
1. It's illegal for any business to play music or dance between 1-6 a.m. Also, can't be open on Sunday.
Of course you can't operate on Sundays. That's the Lord's day and if there's one thing Jesus is known for is that he hates dancing.
2. You have to pay to re-enter club if you leave.
This wouldn't be Utah if the state wasn't A) Religious and 2) Monetary. As Jesus once said: Yea verily thou shalt now pay up, Bitch.
3. Noise can't be heard beyond 100 feet away from business.
There's a lot of old, crotchety people in this town and I sympathize with them because I hate young music too.
4. Restriction on security, they have to be private security (of course.) or be approved by the chief of police.
This one makes sense. People need to be protected. You need trained bouncers, just in case someone has too much to drink and starts making a ruckus.
5. Intoxication in a dance hall is illegal
Seriously? No drinking? Why do we need bouncers again? Whenever someone yells at me about how intrusive and restrictive government is, I agree with them and point to Utah at how much of a nanny-state it is.
People are tired and have to get up to go to church. The no noise beyond 100 feet is crazy. I guess people will have to pick up their cars and carry them if they pass any businesses. Paying to re enter a club is sooooo Utah. Is it still on the books after the private club law has been mostly lifted? People not being able to be intoxicated and dance? really? Are they serious? What are they supposed to be doing? I often wonder what kind of restrictions they have on prescription pills and night quil consumption.
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